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The Dream Letter
Apr 19th, 2025

It was one late night evening
that changed everything for me.

Over two years ago, I wrote this personal letter in a notion page.

(I occasionally write letters to myself to aid in taffakur, a deep contemplation practice to build self-awareness. I especially do so when I feel overwhelmed, confused, and feel unfulfilled in life.)

An unscripted, personal accountability session from me to me.

I am so incredibly tired of life right now.

It has been a year since my iman has decreased very low.

I will have small spurts and doses but it is never sustaining.

I am sick..

Sick: internally, externally, psychologically, emotionally, physically, spiritually — every part of the matter.

I am sick.

And I am sick of being and feeling sick.

I do not know what to say or where even to begin.

I am so tired of life right now but I am so ready to live…

Letter Title: Soul Talk - My Personal Late Night Conversations (00:55AM)

It pained me to remain stagnant for so long.

I knew that I wanted more out of life and that I was not achieving my potential.

But despite that, I did not allow myself to wallow in negativity for too long -
I knew that there was a way out of the cycle and I was determined to find it.

Even though this uncomfortably vulnerable portion of my personal letter reads an emotional picture, I enjoy discovering solutions to all of my problems.

It is like I am solving a rubik’s cube or a crossword puzzle.

Once you shift your perspective, solving your problems will become an enjoyable game.

In fact, you will discover later on in my personal letter, I altered the text to a cheerful green color to contrast the dull grey tones of my screen. Deliberately injecting “life” and “joy” into what initially seemed like a depressing letter.

After taking a moment to collect myself, I shifted my posture, adjusted my face, and started addressing every section of the letter; as if I were advising a different human.

Envisioning someone beloved and dear to me,
I asked myself one simple question:

“What would I say to her?”

Ideas started to flow into mind, faster than a flooding river.

I knew exactly what to say.

Though in reality, I was offering guidance to myself.

One of the most valuable pieces of advice that I can offer you is to search within yourself for solutions to your lifes adversities.

Often, we fall into the belief that the answers to our underlying problems must be found in: a special book, a written post, an expert teacher, a program or course.

Do you notice a common thread here?

We have all been conditioned to believe that the solutions to our problems are exclusively found outside of us.

But here’s the thing: a lot of the time, the answers we seek can also be discovered within.

If we were to concentrate and engage in self-introspection by reflecting regularly, a significant portion of our problems would be resolved.

Honestly speaking, about 90% of our problems would likely be solved.

Now, do not mistake me.

I am not saying that we possess all of the answers on our own.

We still need to rely on accurate sources and receive guidance to help us navigate through life.

Especially as believers, we have been blessed by Allāh (ﷻ) with the ultimate guide: the Qur’an and Sunnah.

It encompasses everything you will ever need to succeed.

Despite the self-development industry and their marketing campaigns goal to convince you otherwise (because let’s be honest, that is where the $$$ is), my job is to remind you of this simple truth: the answers you need are closer than you think.

The Cycle of Life

Life operates in cycles.

Contrary to popular belief, we are not meant to always be happy 24/7.

Nor are we meant to always be sad, depressed, and empty all of the time.

Allāh (ﷻ) says:

وَأَنِ ٱسْتَغْفِرُوا۟ رَبَّكُمْ ثُمَّ تُوبُوٓا۟ إِلَيْهِ يُمَتِّعْكُم مَّتَـٰعًا حَسَنًا إِلَىٰٓ أَجَلٍۢ مُّسَمًّۭى

And [saying], "Seek forgiveness of your Lord and repent to Him, [and] He will let you enjoy a good provision [for a specified term]”

Why did Allāh (ﷻ) say “مَّتَـٰعًا حَسَنًا [a specified term]” and not “eternity” or “forever”?

Because this world is not designed to last forever.

Nor are the luxuries, challenges, pains, or pleasures we experience.

So, it is important for you to understand one rule:

The design of life is cyclical.

A practical example would be our hormonal cycles as women.

(Yet that is not the focus for today, though we will return back to this subject often in future letters)

Cyclical living is not just restricted to a woman’s biological design.

It encompasses life as a whole.

Understanding this will help save you from a lifetime of pain, grief, disappointment, and impatience.

You may have periods of time where you feel ultra-productive, focused, content, determined, driven, and progress — all coming so easy to you.

On the other hand, you may encounter months where you begin to slow down.

You feel less inclined to do and start to grow distant from your life vision.

This is where things may start to feel a little different.

You start to crave components you had in the previous season, whether that is:

• how you used to feel

• your focus levels

• productivity habits

• barakah in your time

You start losing steam.

The drive to wake up early - gone.

The commitment to personal promises - broken.

And next thing you know: you’re stuck.

Frozen in time.

You wake up one morning and you have absolutely no idea who you are or where you are headed.

You start comparing yourself to every person - shaping the thoughts that inhibit your mind.

Thoughts that are mostly negative, dark, and false in nature.

For those in this condition, this letter is for you.

Those who know they deserve more out of life, yet they do not quite know how to get there.

And for the ones who read my previous letter How to Discover and Pursue Your Purpose and want to take things a step further.

Now, let us dive in.

Your Mind: A Powerful Supertool

Your mind is the single-most powerful tool that you possess.

A symbol of human intelligence.

The human brain is a complex organ but it is also one that follows a specific order of instruction.

Whether you are in control or whether it is in control of you is entirely up to you.

To help you understand, I want you to think of your brain as a computer.

It is a super tool made up of around 1 billion neurons. Each neuron develops 1,000 connections to other neurons. When you add this up, you will find over 1 trillion connections.

All of that found in your noggin’ above!

Your brain is responsible for so many different functions: regulating bodily temperature, filtering information (at the blink of an eye), memory and storage, filteration, mind-body connection, processing emotions — I could keep going.

If I were to single out one individual portion of the brain, it would likely take over a hundred lectures to cover only half of that.

Alright, samira. So the brain is a powerful tool.

What does this have to do with changing my life?

I am so glad you asked.

This three-pound multi-complex computer inside of your head can either be used for you or against you.

It is a neutral tool.

Some people often complain about their situation and blame it on their brain. They feel anxious in front of others because of their brain.

They cannot focus and get work done because of their brain.

They feel insecure and shy because of their brain.

But it is not inherently the brains fault for their situation.

Rather it is the person and their approach.

Remember, the brain is a tool.

A tool can be used in many ways.

For instance, you could take an arrow to shoot a target.

You could also take an arrow and shoot an animal.

A tool is used based on the intention of the user.

Your conscious and subconscious mind are both partially responsible for shaping your present day choices and impacting future outcomes.

Every single day, our brain is flooded with streams of thoughts, ranging from mundane daily tasks such as:

• the laundry that is piling up

• the dishes sitting in your sink

• the doctors appointment you need to schedule

• the homework assignments to complete

• a list of groceries you need to restock

To even the deeper contemplations that we have about this dunya and our lives:

• where am I headed?

• the signs of the hour are passing quickly.. am I ready to meet my Lord?

• am I always going to live this way?

• how can I live a life I am proud of?

Most people experience life on repeat and this is what dictates their behaviors (the subconscious world).

The subconscious mind indulging in false programming and thoughts that only drain their mental tank:

• regrets of the past

• the stress and fear of the unknown (future)

• running to dopamine-poor sources (we will talk more about the concept of dopamine rich and dopamine poor sources) like instant gratification, endless entertainment

• the mountain of incomplete tasks piling up

And the list continues.

The modern day mind is engineered by our world to have our attention dispersed in a million different directions.

And instead of taking a step back, slowing down, and deeply reflecting upon the condition of our lives: we continue pacing forward in doubt, stress, worry, and illness.

Thinking that this will accelerate our progress, when in fact it only contributes to us slowing down more.

We convince ourselves that we are headed on the right path and ignore all indications of reality. Instead of living in the present focused on our life vision with daily excitement and a relaxed mind, we choose to live the opposite.

That is right, I said it: we willfully choose to ignore reality.

We live in a body that is starved of purpose, living in a deluded world developed by lack of focus.

Imagine, if you never focus on the future because you are worried about the past, or you cannot focus on the present because you are so worried about the future - when do you expect to truly live? How do you expect to pursue the right things that will ultimately bring you to the future (by the permission of Allāh (ﷻ) that you are stressing about?

When we overly focus on the past, or the worries of the future - our subconscious and conscious mind will find trouble focusing on what matters most. Since the mind is engineered to focus on negativity, disorder will amplify.

If we are not actively engaged in muḥāsabah (self examination), we will lose control of the steering wheel of life and begin to experience discontentment and loss.

Earlier in this letter, I mentioned to you that the brain follows an order of instruction. And that you are to decide whether you control it or it controls you.

Are you beginning to understand now?

You are in control.

To break out of the cycle, you must apply intentionality to your life.

We call this conscious living.

Where we direct our focus, clarity builds.
Where clarity builds, paths are revealed.

The 7 Day Reset (How to Reset Your Life in One Week)

Are you in need of a reset?

This method is a personal process that I use when I feel life has become untidy. I call this the 7 Day Reset.

You might be in this stage if you are constantly thinking about how your life used to be rather than focusing on the future.

Or perhaps you used to have a solid routine in place but now you feel disorganized, drained, and disturbed (the 3 d’s).

This method will help you get back on track.

Here is a brief overview on how to reset your life in 7 days:

1) Observe your Emotions

Open up a journal or digital document and note down the following:

• your daily actions and habits (everything from sunrise until sunset)

• how you feel every morning, afternoon, and night

It is best if you time block and begin this exercise in the morning.

Take at least 30 minutes to do this exercise.

Find a quiet space and be specific in detail.

This is so that you are able to identify where your time is going and where your true priorities are.

Breakdown:

When I first started my personal development journey, I was recovering from an internet addiction.

What contributed to this?

My entire life was on my phone.

Alright.. not my entire life, but it surely felt that way.

From my secular school, islamic studies, self-education pursuits, social communications, and practically any other area of life that I could think of.

While that may seem efficient to some, it also robbed me of many opportunities in the past. It became hard to balance my life because so many commitments were attached to a glass screen.

Although I was “connected”, I had never felt more disconnected before.

I deeply felt:

• disconnected from myself

• disconnected from the world

• disconnected from life experiences (I missed the days where I would sit barefoot and feel the gentle breeze brush across my skin, watching the cows graze the property in my backyard, feeling the raindrops fall all over my body, my heart burning and lungs overworking itself to catch up from the strenuity of running long sprints, the sound of bicycle wheels turning and beating against the concrete, chasing the ice cream truck down the neighborhood with a few dollars in my hand, playing in the snow, jumping in water puddles, pursuing different sports with my brothers, swimming in the ocean, painting and drawing on a blank canvas, observing and picking fruits from my backyard, and so many subtle insignificant moments that build memorial significance in our hearts..)

The internet is a powerful resource but it is also a very, very frightening weapon - stealing from our time and our youth for mere clicks of mindless consumption of information or entertainment.

So what did I do to navigate that season of life?

I deployed the exact method I had advised you with: I wrote down everything from my daily habits and behaviors to how I spend my time.

I would not stop until I pinpointed where my energy, time, and focus is going.

Because I could tell myself I want to improve and accomplish x goals in one year, yet the reality is my actions will convey the strongest message.

Your actions tell a story faster than you ever could.

If you say you are an early riser, yet I find you consistently in bed at 11:00am -
I know where your priorities are.

So if you ever want to know where a person is headed in life, look toward their actions. Observe what and where they direct their focus. It will reveal what is truly important to them.

And the same can be applied to your life.

• where exactly are you directing your focus?

• What does your daily life look like?

• What repeat patterns and triggers have you noticed?

I applied this same plan to my routine by creating a “digital diary” on a private telegram channel a few years ago.

My digital habit tracker

The minus symbol (-) represents negative habits that I aim to get rid of.

Every day, I would document my daily life down to the minute. As I scroll through the entire channel today, I am able to pinpoint habits that I struggled to get rid of and triggers that incited those habits to take place.

I advise you to do the exact same.

All of this is quantitative data to help determine what needs to go to elevate the inner self.

For more details on how to develop this into a consistent habit, read this thread about a personal practice of mine called “Reflective Hour” — a strategy that both my clients & I use to boost our productivity levels.

2) Build Clarity & Identify Your Desires

The easiest mistake you can make in your life is to live without clarity.

You are an easy target for shaytan because of your idleness, as opposed to someone who has a strong vision and is preoccupied with pursuing it.

That is often why you find the time in which people often sin the is when there hands are idle and their mind is free (of thought, of pursuit, of direction).

In order for us to make progress, it is crucial to understand exactly what you want in life.

That is the key to your untapped potential.

The first thought some sisters have is: “What if I do not know what I want in life?”

It is normal for you to feel that way.

Sometimes, in order to understand [a thing] you must learn about it from it’s opposite.

Allāh (ﷻ) says:

وَمِن كُلِّ شَىْءٍ خَلَقْنَا زَوْجَيْنِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَذَكَّرُونَ ٤٩

And We created pairs of all things¹ so perhaps you would be mindful.

Footnote: For example, male and female, sweet and bitter, day and night, plains and mountains, heat and cold, light and darkness. [Dr. Mustafa Khattab, The Clear Quran]

Allāh (ﷻ) created counterparts and opposites in this world.

In order to know happiness, we must experience sadness.

To appreciate light, we must also see darkness.

Therefore, the secret of uncovering what you want is first found in what you don’t want.

I didn’t wake up one morning and know in my heart that I wanted to be an entrepreneur for the rest of my life.

But I did learn through consistent failures and exploration of the negative feelings I had toward my present reality.

Negative emotions can serve as fuel, especially when you are on the brink of changing your life.

By leaning into those negative feelings, you are enabling yourself to:

a) bring recognition to present problems
b) redirect the negative energy to a positive outlook
c) begin actively searching for solutions

instead of ignoring those feelings, you become proactive to avoid silent sabotage.

Write down what you do not want first.

For example, I changed my career choices in university more times than I can count.

A nurse.
A dentist.
A doctor.
A sleep technician.
A pediatrician.
A therapist.

Name a career, I’d probably have tried to pursue it at some point.

Some were “enforced” upon me (which in reality was a false narrative that I cooked up in my mind - no one can force you to do anything) and some I knew with total certainty I personally did not want to go near.

Anything having to do with computers or mathematics bored me.

Cyber security, computer engineering — I didn’t even bat an eye.

And some career paths I pursued for years (ex: nursing) only to find out that I completely hate where I am headed, dropping everything and starting fresh.

And that may seem scary at first.

That is why majority of mankind clings to old paradigms, traditions, and beliefs — clinging to the concept of “certainty” like a security blanket.

But in reality it is fear of the unknown that keeps them from taking forward action.

It is fear of the unknown (the future) that prevents them from making mistakes and embracing failures which will ultimately lead to your success.

It is all about a shift in perspective.

By knowing what I did not want (even with pursuing different paths and making mistakes), I became one step closer to what I do want.

This concept is called an “anti-vision.”

We talked about life vision in our previous letter, a direction that you are actively pursuing and seek to engage in.

As for the anti-vision, it is something that you bring awareness to once and then seek out a solution by starting small: determining a life vision and pursuing creative interests and passions.

Having an anti-vision is good, but it is not worth it to remain fixated on what you do not want.

Remember how we talked about the power of the brain - your personal super-tool? That applies here too, habibti.

Where your focus grows, your brain follows.

If you want to amplify goodness, you need to focus on good.
If you wish to amplify evil, then focus on evil.

Start by developing your life vision.

• What do you want your life to look like?

• How do you want to feel every day?

• What does your mind, soul, and body look like?

• What does the ideal me
  More importantly, what does she do daily?
  In order to become her, you must imitate her.

Be as detailed as possible and write down in great detail your ideal future.

Follow the method that I shared in our previous letter for detailed plan.

Make sure your focus is oriented toward process and not outcomes.

To do this:

• focus on using the written detail as a metric to compare yourself to daily.

• focus more on actions rather than descriptions (you can write about how the ideal you would look, but that won’t be helpful unless you include steps you can take every day to eventually reach that goal).

• a byproduct of action is result.

• focus on the action and the result will come naturally

When you start to lose direction or forget your mission, look at your life vision.

One personal project that I am completing is to create a binder + physical frame where I can both physically see and read daily to remind me of my goals.

In this age of distraction, you must remind yourself every day of your life vision.

That is the only way to win.

3) Organize and Adapt Your Schedule

If you are not seeing results, you either:

• lack energy and feel depleted

• feel overwhelmed by time constraints

• abandoned high-leverage habits that created results

Observe your journal entry and see if you are able to find any patterns in behavior.

This is what helped me to pinpoint “holes” or “pitfalls.”

In order for you to not relapse, you need to identify any potential obstacles.

Ask yourself: “What can I change?”

Do not overpromise or superimpose commitments that do not need to be on your schedule.

Start saying “no” to others more often and start committing to yourself.

Cut back on meetings or other tasks and use that free time to devote to building your mind, your body, your soul, and your wellbeing.

Rearrange commitments and tasks to create more time.

Write down and brain dump your scattered thoughts on paper and reorganize your life accordingly.

4) Your Daily Action Plan

Now that you have determined what you want and what you do not want, you need two things to move onto the next level.

1. Self Education (Learning) - quality information to aid in self growth and skill development

2. Building - use acquired knowledge to actively build and strengthen craft and creative projects

I had previously shared with you two terms to keep in mind:

• dopamine rich

• dopamine poor

Dopamine poor activities often correlate with instant gratification and habits that do not contribute to our immediate or long-term growth.

These two habits are known to be “Dopamine Rich” —

This is a form of earned dopamine - it is not something you gain passively (like scrolling online or watching an entertaining video), rather it is created through active action.

Begin with 25-30 minutes each day.

In the morning, reserve this time for self-education.
Note: This is after you have given quality attention to the recitation of the qur’an, adkhar, and other ibadaat.

After you take a break, reserve 30 minutes to build a creative project that will contribute to your life vision.

By setting aside one hour of time every morning, the compound effect will take into effect — 1% of incremental growth stacking up to shape your future.

5) Develop a Weekly Plan

Your current state of disordered living is due to the absence of structure.

Your nafs will always incline to submit toward you. However, the problem usually occurs when its master is weak.

The nafs needs to be trained and disciplined: this includes the way that you approach your time.

Take around 10-15 minutes in the evening to write down every activity you plan to take on for the upcoming week.

Ideally, this would be done on a physical planner or journal (stay away from blue light emitting devices in the evening).

Here is an outline to help you:

• morning routine

• 4 hours of deep work schedule

• personal commitments & meetings

• hobbies and family time

• evening routine

The most challenging part of this is staying consistent with your new routine.

Be mindful of challenges and obstacles you will encounter on your way.

Embrace failure and think of it as a game of trial and error.

If something does not flow smoothly, just jot down in your journal or notebook what went right and what supposedly “went wrong” and adjust your schedule based on your new outline for the following day.

This iterative process is exactly how to reset and manage your life.

By mapping out your week, addressing obstacles, and experimenting with solutions, you will slowly take incremental steps to creating the ideal future you desire.

You will build with intention and become more efficient over time.

Before you know it, you’ll be further than you had ever dreamed of.

This weeks letter draws to a gentle close.

Until next time, darling.

Stay beautiful and stay dreamin.’ ♡

With love,
Samira